What does “Say Everything” mean?

The idea is, in modern psychoanalysis, that you come in and you talk. The quote is, “say everything.” It sounds so simple to come in and just say everything. It’s very difficult. The term for the difficulty, what gets in the way, is called a resistance: resistance to saying everything, telling your life story, and putting all your thoughts and feelings into words.

Freud initially said, psychoanalysis is the study of transference and resistance. Transference is the relationship between the patient and the analyst. The thought is that if you and I walked into a room, and there were a bunch of people there. You may like seven of them, I may like four. Of those, three may like me, and five might like you. Why? What’s the difference?

Well, the difference comes from the term transference. Transference is really … your first relationships are with your primary objects. Pardon the psychobabble, but, your objects are your mother, and then your father. The first thing you really come in contact with. How you relate to other people is really your transferring those feelings, and what went right, what went wrong with, probably your mother and your father, onto people you meet. What feels right? What feels wrong? That’s why, when you meet somebody, you have a positive feeling, a negative feeling, you like this person, you don’t like this person. Transference is the way the patient relates to the analyst. ~ Rafael Sharón, NCPsyA, SCPsyA, Psychoanalyst in Princeton NJ